I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia this past December right before coming out to college. I had been away from home for fourteen months serving a church mission before being sent home early on medical release. I had problems with pain and depression for years, but the mission magnified these things beyond my capability to stay where I was. Once I returned home the battle with doctors started all over. The blood tests, the scans, the probing, and all of the other pleasantries of the family doctor, all of which coming out to “you’re normal.”
Finally, after months, I was given a referral to see a specialist. After more blood tests and more poking and prodding it was determined that I have fibromyalgia.
I reacted about as well as anyone would after being told that I had an incurable disease filled with chronic pain. I was happy to finally have an answer, but did not understand why this was happening; I had so many plans for my life that now looked impossible.
Now I am at college still pushing forward one day at a time. It isn’t easy and I frequently feel like giving up, but I still continue to push forward.
Today was one of my hard days. I was lying on my bed in pain when I received a message from my sister back home. It was a Facebook post for the NYC Caterpillar Walk showing beautiful photos and posts to raise awareness for fibromyalgia. Seeing this, I was reminded that I am not the only one fighting this battle. It may be an invisible disease, but I am a visible person.
The purpose for this blog is to help me by having an outlet and a way to cope with the disease, but also to, hopefully, help others out there that may be suffering in similar ways. This life is beautiful and meant to be enjoyed. My condition does not define me and will not control me. I am more than fibromyalgia and I will go on.